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#Funny News

#Funny News

University of Michigan Professor Hosts Talk on the Virtues of Pedophilia

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 05:45 PM PST

Professor Promotes Pedophilia

Outrage-fests are a favorite outing of college social justice warriors. Antifa mosh pits are their go-to against conservative speakers on campus (see Berkeley Demanding Massive 'Security Fees' for Ben Shapiro. But they Love Free Speech! and LOL: Wimpy College Socialists to 'Fight Back' Against Steven Crowder…). Meanwhile when one of the left’s own thin-lipped harpy professors threatens to abuse children, crickets.

Below is an event description for a talk at the University of Michigan. The male professor of women’s studies will talk about the virtues of pedophilia.

To identify a relational form as "queer kinship" is to implicitly dignify and redeem it. What are the limits of such redemption?  Its shape is discernable within French author and activist Jean Genet's (1910-1986) life practices of affiliation, including his habit of introducing himself into the domesticities of heterosexual couples, his practice of financing the heterosexual households of his younger male lovers, and his fantasy of himself as the adopted foundling of the Black Panther Party. Pederastic kinship is a forgotten and uncomfortable precursor to gay and lesbian "chosen" and nuclear family that restores power and inequality to overly idealized imaginaries of queer kinship.

Presented by the Doing Queer Studies Now RIW. Cosponsored by IRWG’s Lesbian-Gay-Queer Research Initiative (LGQRI) and the Institute for the Humanities.

For those who don’t speak gay verbiage, pederasty is the sexual relationship between a teen boy and a man. A.K.A. kid diddling.

Scared Little Boy

This professor is publicly proclaiming he believes there’s a benefit to little boys monkeying around with old men things. He even acknowledges such a notion is criticized by his fellow [British word for cigarettes]. In other words, the minority of minorities are discriminating against their own minority. We’re guessing he personally has a liking for lads.

Contrast this evil specimen with peeps like Ben Shapiro and Steven Crowder. Their only fault is the discussion of conservative viewpoints: preservation of small humans, prevention of illegals invading America, etc. They aren’t calling for the murder of infidels. They aren’t screaming for the extermination of a race. They aren’t encouraging illegal behaviors. All these which have been encouraged by liberal scholars. Though we can see how Ben Shapiro’s presence might conjure unclean thoughts from the possibly pederastic professor.

Leftism has poisoned education. They present only one side of an argument, stagnate critical thought, and purge away all male freshmen in a 10-mile radius. Unless, of course, said freshman would like to get fresh with older men.


Media Celebrates North Korean Cheerleaders, Ignores Disturbing Details

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 05:34 PM PST

North Korea has been dominating the news cycle lately. The Olympics themselves, not so much. At least North Korea is there, though, and that’s what counts (or something). Now some on the left are currently wetting themselves over creepy North Korean cheerleaders. Marveling at them for “stealing the spotlight” and affectionately referring to them as North Korea’s “weapons of mass distraction.”

There’s more than a few problems with this. But first, watch as the media once more proves itself to be Kim Jon-un’s right hand fanboys.

The most obvious problem is western media giving undue attention to a communist dictatorship. They’re obsessing over all the figures, highlighting every detail (see Today Show Anchor Destroys the Media Over Their Love of Kim Jong Un’s Sister). The public fixation in itself is disturbing, unhealthy, and morally questionable at best. Like when 12-year-olds discover memes.

Secondly, these cheerleaders are little more than servants to the communist regime. They’re Kim Jong’s tools. Observe:

[In 2006] twenty-one members of North Korean cheering squads who traveled to South Korea for international sports events [were] held in a prison camp for talking about what they saw in the South, a news report said. The female cheering squad apparently violated a pledge not to speak about what they saw in South Korea, the Chosun Ilbo reported.

Citing another unnamed defector, the newspaper said the cheerleaders had pledged before going to South Korea that they would treat the country as “enemy territory” and never speak about what they saw there, accepting punishment if they broke the promise.

If these women are forced to abide by such insane rules, it takes no stretch of the imagination to think they have little choice when it comes to performing. They likely even fear for their lives, seeing as saying the wrong thing gets them thrown in the clink. If they’re lucky.

Nothing about North Korea is glamorous. These cheerleaders, like the rest of their countrymen, are not allowed to be individuals. Just Asian underlings destined to do their leader’s bidding. All the while packed in with 200 other servant sardines. They can’t even take joy in their accomplishments because it’s required of them as their national duty. Kim Jong’s moonfaced grossness made sure of that.

For people who hate Trump for his “dictatorial qualities,” the mainstream media sure seems to love licking Kim’s boots. Have fun down there.


Ruth Bader Ginsburg Claims Hillary Clinton Lost Because of Sexism

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 04:53 PM PST

Ginsburg Hillary Sexism

It’s been nearly a year-and-a-half since Trump slew the pantsuited she-beast. You would think mention of the 2016 election would exist only in history books. Along with dabbing and Pokemon Go. Yet, here we are in 2018, and leftists are still whining and making excuses for Hillary’s defeat.

Either that or Ruth Bader Ginsburg forgot what year it is.

During a Columbia University Women’s Conference event on Sunday, Ginsburg was asked to clarify remarks she made last September, in which she said sexism was a “major, major factor” in how the election played out.

“I think it was difficult for Hillary Clinton to get by even the macho atmosphere prevailing during that campaign, and she was criticized in a way I think no man would have been criticized,” Ginsburg said.

“I think anyone who watched that campaign unfold would answer it the same way I did: Yes, sexism played a prominent part,” she continued.

So, if I read those remarks correctly, Hillary Clinton was the underdog in 2016 and the media hates her.

iceman bullshit

Except Hillary was no underdog. The media fawned over her like she was a pre-house-egging Justin Bieber. She could do no wrong in their eyes. Barry Bike Helmet even went out of his way to help cover up her criminal activities. She had all the odds in her favor.

As for being “criticized like never before:” the left has been labelling the apricot-hued gentleman she ran against with every negative name in the book. We can’t go a single week without some leftist airhead referring to Trump as a gay-genociding, brown-people-hating lovechild of Hitler.

You’d think the left would realize by now there wasn’t some complex, sexist plot against them. They just ran a craptastic candidate. Trump has at least some redeeming qualities. Maybe Democrats should accept their candidate sucked, instead of blaming their loss on racism, sexism, and every other “ism” they can muster up.


Sarah Huckabee Blasts the Media’s Sudden Concern About Classified Info

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 03:11 PM PST

The media has been up in arms about the Rob Porter fiasco. But for a second, let’s set aside the domestic violence aspect of the Rob Porter story. Yes, due process is important. Yes, domestic abusers should be punished cruelly and unusually. Yes, the White House’s messaging on it was incoherent at best.

These are each valid points. There is another issue at hand, though. The story has brought up a question over who has access to classified information. What the hold up is for certain people getting classified information. Basically, the media has a strange new concern about classified info getting into the wrong hands (see Twitter Buried Anti-Hillary #DNCLeak & #PodestaEmails Tweets in 2016).

Sarah Sanders was hardly impressed.

If you guys have real concerns about leaking out classified information, look around this room. You guys are the ones that publish classified information, & put national security at risk. That doesn’t come from this White House.

Sanders isn’t wrong. Personally, I don’t think the media is concerned over who has the info… As much as they’re concerned about who will give it to them. The press has never had a problem letting info leak from them faster than a spicy burrito leaks from an unprepared colon.

Height of hypocrisy right here, folks.


Painter of Obama Portrait Likes to Portray Black Women Decapitating White Women

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 02:42 PM PST

Painter Likes to Portray Decapitated White Women

This morning, the National Portrait Gallery (of the Smithsonian) unveiled two portraits of the Obamas. They should’ve kept the covers on, as there is much mockery. But wait: there’s one more very racist surprise (see REAL RACISM: BlackLivesMatter Leader Calls for Genocide of White People… and Dear Liberals: You're Now Creating More Real Racism Than Ever).

First, let’s take a peek at the original paintings.

Looks like the artist was a high schooler with a broken Xbox and too many number-2 pencils.

Then there’s this:

Oh. A garden. That’s what it’s supposed to be. To the untrained eye, it looked like a chair levitating in front of a man-eating shrub.

In case the paintings above didn’t already blind your seeing orifices, we have an interesting factoid about the painter of Obama’s piece: he loves to paint pics of decapitated white women.

Decapitated Painting 1 Decapitated Painting 2

Yes, for inquiring minds, those are technically better paintings. Balanced. Full of depth. Realistic — in the way they portray Black Lives Matter.

Picture a white painter who enjoys portraying white women holding the bloodied heads of black women. Who was then embraced by Trump for painting a portrait of the First Family. Social justice mobs would burn his house down. The FBI would show up on his doorstep to arrest him for “hate crimes.” Angry feminists would call for his castration. Conversely, this list applies in no way to the paintings above. Instead, this racist man was asked to paint the face of a former president. For money.

Discrimination, in intangible measures (like the paintings above), toward people because of skin color is racism. All races should be treated equally, but the images above constitute two inequalities. Firstly, white people being violently targeted for their creaminess. Secondly, giving black people a “get out of jail free” card for being the discriminators. Burning the racist candle at both ends.

Speaking of racism, there’s now a test for knowing whether or not a person has white privilege. Behold:


Even MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough is Disgusted at Media’s North Korea Love Affair

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 12:19 PM PST

North Korea is the ugly girl sitting in the corner at the school dance. The media wants to give her a makeover and call her Prom Queen. Just a few problems though. Namely the fact it involves a plethora of lies and propaganda (see Moronic NBC Got Tricked into Feeding North Korea Propaganda. The Internet Roasts Them.). Also North Korea is ruled by an evil dictator who wants to crush all things human rights. Small detail.

Suffice it to say, the media’s love fest is rather cringeworthy. Joe Scarborough isn’t a fan.

MSNBC host Joe Scarborough slammed the mainstream media Monday on "Morning Joe" for fawning over North Korea at the Winter Olympics, calling the scene "bizarre."

Scarborough was interviewing president of The Council on Foreign Relations Richard Haass about the prospect of peace with North Korea and compared the media's reaction to screaming teenagers at a Beatles concert.

Keep in mind, the same culture that loathes patriotism and American families is now celebrating North Korea. A communist dictatorship. But you’re the fascist.

Mainstream media has managed to put their true colors on display (see Today Show Anchor Destroys the Media Over Their Love of Kim Jong Un’s Sister). Spoiler: it’s a murky, fecal brown. Gross.

They sweep their love for communism under the rainbow rug while chalking it up to “tolerance.” Give North Korea a chance, they’re trying. By waddling over to the Olympics and peddling even more propaganda our way.

Interestingly, the left has no such tolerance for those who dare disagree with them politically, or those who fail to twist themselves into the liberal logic pretzel. That compassionate understanding is reserved exclusively for Kim Jong-un.


Video: Owen Benjamin Mocks Justin Trudeau Over His ‘Peoplekind’ Comments

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 10:02 AM PST

I can never pass up an opportunity to mock Justin “I Feel Pretty” Trudeau. The man person is a walking flaccid penis with expensive hair care politics who thinks dumb things (see WATCH: Justin Trudeau Wants ISIS Reintegrated into Society. Opposition HAMMERS Him… and Proud Feminist Justin Trudeau Shames His Own Sons for Toxic 'Masculine' Nature).

One of his greatest highlights was when he out-virtue-signaled a feminist by demanding she say “humankind” instead of “mankind.” Which is his douchey way of saying, “b***, you just got served!”

But maybe it is time. The word “man” has been tacked on to the beginning of words for decades. It’s a patriarchal plot. Is it time to speak with precision of language? It’s a question posed by the wise Owen Benjamin and an entire cast of unBEARables…

This one line made me spit out my oatmeal:

It’s time for Jordan PeterSON to change his name. To Jordan Notdescriptgenitalchild.

kelso laughing

We could play this game all day. Manitoba becomes Personitoba. Human becomes hu-person. Pillsbury Doughperson. Norperson Bates. Who would’ve ever guessed a simple three-letter combo could be so triggering. I suppose we should be burning Neil Armstrong in effigy for carrying “problematic patriarchal language” to the moon.

Left-leaning comedians claim there’s just nothing about the left to make fun of. Which is a joke in and of itself. What those comedians are really saying is “I’m a big duncetastic leftist who sucks at life.” In reality, it’s rare for a left-winger to not say something that’s ripe for mocking. “Math is hard, therefore it’s racist.” “Hillary Clinton is hip to all the me-mes and the jifs.”

Even with this video, Owen Benjamin and his crew didn’t really have to embellish anything. The material practically came ready-made. The jokes are there. The jokes have always been there.


New York Teamsters Become A ‘Sanctuary Union’ to Protect Illegal Members

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 07:17 AM PST

Sanctuary Union

New York and California are in constant combat over who can out-leftist the other. Along with who can have the highest taxes and worst business environment. But that’s a post for another time. This one is about our fence-hopping amigos who reside here illegally. Also known as Democrats’ favorite demographic. For the time being, anyway.

California has come out strong in the battle (see California AG: I'll Prosecute Employers Who Work With Immigration Officials and Moronic California Votes to Become a Sanctuary STATE). But California doesn’t have a SANCTUARY UNION!

Score one for New York. I guess.

Worried about federal immigration policies, a New York labor organization is taking steps to protect its own.

Across Long Island and throughout the city, some 120,000 Teamsters are getting prepped to become a "sanctuary union."

In 27 shops, business agents, supervisors and front-line workers are getting schooled on their rights under U.S. law — and when and how to challenge federal immigration agents who show up to search their work sites.

The training is complex and technical — hinging on specific types of warrants and the definition of a raid.

But in fundamental labor terms, it follows one simple rule: Union solidarity first, immigration status second.

How nice of the teamsters to stick up for their law-breaking members. Brothers to the end. Or, at least until the illegal Teamster fails to stay up-to-date on his union dues. Sounds more like “money first, following the law second.” Great job, guys.

conan sarcastic clap

We’ve always known unions to be greedier than Amy Schumer hogging a communal box of Krispy Kremes. But, I never expected them to sell out their own country for an extra buck or two. Lefties, remind us all again how it’s the evil, mustache-twirling corporations who are breaking the rules for their own gain.

Leftist amorality strikes again.


Trump to Announce $1.5T Infrastructure Plan. Dems Hate it Already

Posted: 12 Feb 2018 05:54 AM PST


Donald Trump is apparently gearing up to announce a $1.5 trillion infrastructure plan. Though details are scarcer than a happy meal in Venezuela. The few rumored details seem to fall under what our carrot-colored commander-in-chief said at the SOTU: "Every federal dollar should be leveraged by partnering with state and local governments and — where appropriate — tapping into private sector investment…."

But even without the details, Democrats are already sharing their assessment.

in living color hated it

A number of Democrats and the U.S. Chamber of Commerce have pushed the administration to commit far more federal dollars, funded by tax increases, or by closing tax loopholes. And environmental groups expressed worry about its impact.

"President Trump's infrastructure proposal is a disaster," said Shelley Poticha, of the Natural Resources Defense Council. "It fails to offer the investment needed to bring our country into the 21st century. Even worse, his plan includes an unacceptable corporate giveaway by truncating environmental reviews."

I love how the first thing they go to is that Trump isn’t blowing enough money or robbing the taxpayers of more coin. $1.5T isn’t enough to the left. As for raising taxes, it’s like these chuckleheads never learn (see Report: Middle America Likes Their 'Crumbs.' Don't Tell Nancy Pelosi… and Nancy Pelosi vs Reality on the Trump Tax Cuts).

We’ll see what Trump announces. We’ll also see what dumb thing Trump tweets to distract people from the announcement. If anything. There’s a lot up in the air right now. Also, let’s be honest. Conservatives went cuckoo for cocoa puffs when Obama suggested a cheaper infrastructure plan. Let’s see what offsets are in Trump’s plan before cheering for it.

But even with all these questions up in the air, all it took was the name “Trump” to trigger the left into a blind rage.