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Muslim Teen Lied About Vicious Hate Crime. Now She’s Being Charged.

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 06:57 PM PDT

Fake Hate Crime Charge

2017 was riddled with hate crime hoaxes. Not to be outdone, 2018 is also digging up its fair share of hate crime fakery. The latest to make the news: a little girl claimed she was viciously attacked by a prejudiced man.

Yeah, she lied.

A 13-year-old girl will be charged after authorities say she lied about being held at knifepoint by a man who ripped off her headscarf.

She said the man put a knife against her arm and called her a “terrorist.” She claimed he then covered her mouth to muffle her screams and removed her headscarf before fleeing.

Investigators say they determined that the alleged encounter never happened. Detectives have obtained a petition, charging the teen with knowingly filing a false police report.

There was no headscarf-hating man to be found. Instead, just a bored little liar playing games with the police.

This constant fakery is quite the trend among youngins. You’ll notice the hoaxers tend to be part of a certain demographic. One of the left’s special victim classes, if you will. It’s almost as if there isn’t enough prejudice to go around, so now the victim du jour must fashion his/her/zer own crime of hatefulness.

Take a gander at the examples below.

Those are just to name a few. Not every case is so swiftly slapped with the hand of justice. This child will be punished accordingly, by the law. By her family? An honor killing might be on the docket. Let’s hope not.

We made a nifty collection of the top 5 hate crimes in recent history. Feast your eyes on them. Not in a hate crimey way though.


Antifa to Shut Down ‘Fascist’ Christian Pro-Life Speaker

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 05:13 PM PDT

Antifa Pro-Life Speaker

We haven’t been hearing much lately from everyone’s favorite group of left-wing paramilitary mama’s boys, Antifa. Well, they must have finally finished taking out the trash and cleaning their rooms, because they’re back on the scene.

A group of Antifa douchelords is trying to shut down a Christian pro-life speaker. Because her anti-abortion advocacy is “fascism.” Yeah, not even joking.

Antifa is planning to disrupt April speeches planned by Students for Life of America President Kristan Hawkins, calling her a "Christian-fascist" who spews "anti-women poison."

The Antifa group Refuse Fascism, particularly its Orange County, San Diego, Bay Area and Los Angeles chapters in California, scheduled protests for April 10 and April 11, reported Campus Reform.

"The anti-choice agenda being pushed by Trump/Pence and their fascist movement is nothing less than preparing for the ground for a real-life 'Handmaid's Tale,' with women completely enslaved and subordinated to a patriarchal order," insists Refuse Fascism.

So, if I’m understanding this right, allowing this speaker to publicly disagree with infanticide would lead to a dystopia. A future of babies being born with their brains unsucked. A nightmarish wasteland of dirty diapers and late-night wakeup calls. Having to step over those annoying child-proof gates blocking every doorway in your house. Horrific.

You know you’re on the losing side when the best argument you can muster is a third-rate fictional television program. Next, they’ll be citing Waterworld when fighting climate change. District 9 to argue open borders. The Running Man to justify their distaste for game shows.

The only real fascists in this scenario are the thrift store ninjas trying to stifle somebody’s free speech. Those Antifa goons would realize that if they didn’t have their bandana-covered heads crammed up their rectums.


‘Handmaid’s Tale’ Author Blames Star Wars for 9/11

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 05:13 PM PDT

Handmaid's Tale

Silly me. I thought the dumbest Star Wars take this week was going to be the trailer for Solo. Instead, we have Margaret Atwood, author of Handmaid’s Tale, saying the 9/11 attackers got the idea from watching Star Wars. The derp is strong with this one.

star wars

Let me say right off that bat, there’s a good chance there’s sarcasm here I’m not picking up on. I pray to the Jedi order there is. Though I feel I’m in my legal right to assume the feminist author of Handmaid’s Tale is comedically challenged. Like most leftists.

Because as overly-politicized as the movies have gotten (see Jon Favreau is Directing a Star Wars TV Series, and the Internet Isn't Happy and Liberals Call on Star Wars Actor to Apologize for 'Insensitive' Race Comments.), this just makes the jump to hyperspace. Into an asteroid field. With the Death Star on the other side. And the Starkiller behind it. Behind that, the deadliest of them all: George Lucas with the master copies of the Prequels.

Atwood starts by talking about a theatrical play based on her grossly overrated book that she saw in 2000. If you’re not familiar with Handmaid’s Tale, if it were a Star Wars character, it would be the lovechild of Jar Jar Binks and Wicket the Ewok. It's a wretched hive of lame and dumbassery.

DINGBAT AUTHOR: It started with a film reel going across the top of the stage and showing various things blowing up. And one of the things that blew up was the Twin Towers. But it hadn't blow up yet. They did the opera again, and they had to take it out, because it was no longer in the future. Does that give you a creepy feeling?

VARIETY: Yes, it does.
DINGBAT AUTHOR: They didn't get that idea from my opera, don't worry. They got the idea from "Star Wars."

Here’s where the derp awakens.

VARIETY: Do you really believe that?
DINGBAT AUTHOR: Remember the first one? Two guys fly a plane in the middle of something and blow that up? The only difference is, in "Star Wars," they get away. Right after 9/11, they hired a bunch of Hollywood screenwriters to tell them how the story might go next. Sci-fi writers are very good at this stuff, anticipating future events. They don't all come true, but there are interesting "what if" scenarios.

star wars

My brain hurts.

Maybe they got the idea from Titanic. Let’s blame James Cameron for some of this, too.

This is your modern left, America. Blaming the actions of terrorists on fictional space play.

Though it’s a shame the 9/11 attackers didn’t watch Star Trek instead. They would have been too bored to plan anything. Come to think of it, they did pull a Captain Picard and “Engage” ahead. So.


Concealed Carry Class Enrollment Spikes in Spite of Gun Control Push

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 03:22 PM PDT

Concealed Carry Class Spike

Each time there’s a mass shooting, the left takes to the streets with picket signs and demands we fork over our boomsticks. Each time, they become bolder in their quest. While originally, leftists were calling for “common sense” gun measures, now they’re squealing for us to repeal the Second Amendment entirely. Big mistake.

In fact, the left’s push for and end to gats is actually inspiring people to get strapped:

People are surging to sign up for training to carry concealed weapons in the wake of the Parkland school shooting, as experts say sustained media coverage and calls for more gun control encourage people to look for ways to protect themselves.

Gun sales also appear to be on the rise, based on federal background checks.

The National Carry Academy in Minnesota says the number of people in its concealed carry courses has increased more than 200 percent since the Valentine's Day shooting at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Florida. The company said it was the biggest jump since the 2012 school shooting in Newtown, Connecticut.

Stay quiet for a moment and you’ll be able to hear the left collectively screaming “OOPS!” at the monster they’ve created.

Unbeknownst to the left, they’re the greatest gun salesmen around. If they had even a basic understanding of economics, they’d realize they’re the ones creating a demand for blasters and NRA membership. When there’s a fear of guns becoming scarce, peeps will happily max out their credit cards with bulk purchases of ammo and AR lowers. People will take to the town in search of the nearest concealed class. Lead pellets will plink steel in greater numbers.

The real question is when will the left take a hint and learn to keep their anti-handcannon threats to themselves. Every time they open their mouths, they’re only making the gun “problem” bigger.

Congratulations, lefties, on being employee of the month at every gun store in the U-S-of-A. All the beers to you.


Ben Sasse Asks Mark Zuckerberg to Define “Hate Speech.” It Doesn’t Go Well.

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 02:35 PM PDT

Ted Cruz was the first to take a bite out of Douchebag-in-Charge Mark Zuckerberg. But Ben Sasse wasn’t going to let Cruz be the only one to make the Markster cry.

How do you define “hate speech”?


mr. bean

This comes after Marky Mark outlined that his platform would eventually develop AI which could wipe out “hate speech” like your mom wiped your tushie as an infant. I embellished there a bit.

Going from “violent groups to hate speech in a hurry” is a problem. Policing speech, on a giant platform like Facebook, is a huge issue. Adults, as Sasse pointed out, need to engage in debate. However petty the comment sections may be. Calling for violence isn’t protected. We’ve already made that clear. But “hurting feelings” isn’t hate speech. You don’t have the right to go through life not getting offended. Otherwise, I would’ve sued Hillary Clinton whenever she called herself a woman. Don’t lump me in with her.

People like Mark Zuckerberg are running the internet. They’re the gatekeepers. They want to ban “hate speech” but can’t even define the term. Scared?

As to Sasse’s point about social media addiction, I’ve hit on that as well: OPINION: Social Media, and How We Use It, is a Real Problem.


Al Gore Claims Trump is the Greatest Threat America Has Faced. James Woods Corrects Him

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 02:13 PM PDT

We’re nearly a year-and-a-half past the 2016 election, yet leftists still can’t let it go. All this time, they’ve been whining like a disgruntled toddler in the toy aisle at Walmart. Or they’ve been rambling about the end-times like a street corner hobo who smells like a garbage bag. Usually some combination of the two.

Take this Al Gore clip for example. He’s claiming the Donald is the biggest threat to American democracy in his lifetime. Yes, really:

Well, we now know who’s the frontrunner for dunce of the year. “Never mind all the totalitarian douchery the U-S-of-A has been facing throughout its history. There’s a Republican in the White House!”

andrew mccarthy shocked glass drop

Enter James Woods for a good, old-fashioned face-wrecking:

How do you like them inconvenient truths, Al?

Like Jimbo points out, there have been a crap-ton of threats to America in Gore’s lifetime. Filthy Communist buttmunches trying to infect us with their far-left assholery. The persistent threat of nuclear war with those same dirty commies. Heck, a whole three years before Gore was born, a psychotic German guy with a little man complex was taking a shot at global domination. These were much bigger threats than an “evil” guy who likes low taxes and border walls.

Leftists like Gore are simply bitter because they’re losers. They’re incapable of accepting that people thought Trump’s ideas were better and voted accordingly. For some reason, the American people just weren’t onboard with the government jacking all of their money and regulating the bejeezus out of their lives. It’s one of the great mysteries of our time.

Some friendly advice. Since the left would rather throw a perpetual tantrum than craft some better policies, they had better pace themselves. They’ve still got six-and-a-half more years ahead of them.


Mark Zuckerberg Tells Congress His Plan to Stop “Hate Speech.” It’s Disturbing.

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 02:01 PM PDT

Many things make Mark Zuckerberg a terrifying man. His vast control of social media. His sallow skin and pale, watery eyes. Most notably, though, it’s his censor-happy ways. Something we’re seeing in full swing today as the Zuckster appears before Congress. First, a little context as to why he’s visiting Capitol Hill. Facebook is in some hot water regarding data mining.

After privately assuring senators that his company will do better, Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg is undergoing a two-day congressional inquisition that will be very public — and could be pivotal for his massive company.

Zuckerberg visited with senators in closed-door meetings Monday, previewing the public apology he plans to give Congress on Tuesday after revelations that the data-mining firm Cambridge Analytica gathered personal information from 87 million users to try to influence elections.

The meeting has featured everything from Mark spewing sorries to old senators asking how Facebook makes money. Also (probably) what is Facebook? Inquiring octogenarians want to know.

Eventually the topic of hate speech arose. Don’t act surprised now, this is Facebook we’re talking about. Here’s where it gets really disturbing.

Hate speech is one of the hardest. Because determining if something is hate speech is very linguistically nuanced. You need to understand what is a slur and whether something is hateful.

Hold up, that’s the point. What we consider hate speech is vastly different than what Lena Dunham’s genderqueer barber deems hate speech.

We’ve been deploying AI tools already. 99% of the ISIS and al-Qaeda content that we take down on Facebook, our AI systems flagged before any human sees it. So that’s a success in rolling out AI tools that can proactively police and enforce safety across the community. I am optimistic that over a 5-10 year period we will have AI tools that can get into some of the linguistic nuances to be more accurate in flagging things for our systems.

In other words, in five to ten years, Facebook will be your electronic mommy. Say the wrong thing and get your tongue washed with soap.

Many of us are looking forward to this not happening. Thought dissenters are often targeted under the ruse of hate speech (see PROOF: Youtube Caught Targeting/Restricting Conservative Videos! and SHOTS FIRED: Google Targets Conservative Media with Biased New Feature).

Zuckerberg flat out says he wants to “police” the online community’s speech. Shamelessly. Yet as he admits himself, hate speech is difficult to monitor. Partly because it’s too ambiguous and ill-defined. So Facebook is making all these plans to “objectively enforce” that which by definition cannot be objective. You know, because hate speech isn’t a thing. More on that in the video below.

Also, watch Zuckster get beat by Ted Cruz. Just do it.

Quick, take a peek before the thought police arrive!


Ted Cruz HAMMERS Mark Zuckerberg for Facebook’s Anti-Conservative Bias

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 01:48 PM PDT

Lemme give you an idea of how the Facebook hearing with Mark Zuckerberg has mostly bumbled along: imagine explaining how Facebook works to your grandmother. Alive or dead. That’s largely how the hearing is going. One 33-year-old guy telling a bunch of old farts how tech works. Painful.

Then Ted Cruz came up to bat:

The only thing wrong with the exchange was it didn’t last long enough. I needed time to get snacks.

michael jackson popcorn

Ted Cruz isn’t wrong. Facebook has been incredibly biased toward conservatives. On might say purposefully so.

The question Ted Cruz started with “Are you a neutral forum or a publisher engaging in political speech” may open up Zuckerberg’s Facebook to a slew of new issues. Especially considering Facebook isn’t, allegedly, a neutral forum.

What say you?


Bitter California Withholds Assistance as National Guard Goes to US-Mexico Border

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 12:44 PM PDT

In today’s news, the state of California is pissy and won’t comply with the federal government. So, regular Tuesday. The Trump administration recently requested National Guard members to man the border. Because, as Trump has been trying to tell California, it’s feeble down there. Something I’m sure Jerry Brown has heard plenty in the course of his lifetime, regarding all manner of… things. Penis joke. Sorry, they just come to me.

A few ignored requests and self-righteous squabbles later and we’re here. Governor Brown is mid-PMS. The National Guard plans are moving forward. Without California.

National Guard members have begun arriving at the U.S.-Mexico border as requested last week by President Trump, but California’s Democratic Gov. Jerry Brown is still mum on whether his state will participate in the deployment.

California has frequently fought with the Trump administration over illegal immigration, with one San Diego lawmaker saying that it’s now a “rogue state.”

Other states have stepped up to the plate while California throws its sippy cup on the floor. Arizona, Texas, and New Mexico are reportedly sending Guard members to the border. There’s still time for Jerry Brown to participate, but don’t hold your breath. Unless you’d rather suffocate than inhale California’s noxious fumes. The state has a habit of fighting golden tooth and jagged nail when it comes to participating with the Trump (see California Gov. Jerry Brown Pens Self Righteous Letter to Trump. Lectures America on Walls.).

Mean Girls Gif

While the California-Trump feud rages on, the border is still in need of security. Specifically walling. Some of us are still holding onto hope we’ll see the promised wall soon. But in the meantime, a couple thousand National Guard members is nice too.


Dear Feminists: The Pay Gap Isn’t Real. You Just Suck.

Posted: 10 Apr 2018 10:26 AM PDT

Feminists equal pay

Dear feminists who thinks the answer to everything is behaving like rabid shrews:

The myth of the gender pay gap has been busted more times than you’ve busted weight scales. In efforts to be thorough, a brief breakdown: the “gap” stems from an average between the full time salaries of men and women. Once experience, profession, hours worked, and other relevant data is factored in, the gap all but disappears. Much like my patience for grousing ladies who can’t math.

Incessant crying about “equal pay” suggests one of three things:

  1. You’re too stupid to understand averages.
  2. You know the pay gap isn’t real, but grousing about it fools enough men into fighting this silliness along side you, or giving you their money (which is kind of genius).
  3. You’re terrible at your job, and blaming some myth is your meal ticket to better meals.

Again, the Gender Pay Gap is a myth. So if you genuinely believe men are making more for the “same work,” rest assured. They’re not.

For the purpose of this column, I’m focused on number three: you’re terrible at your job. Because if you were good at your job, you wouldn’t complain about this gender pay gap in hopes men will give you some of their money either directly, or by enlisting them to demand companies pay ladies more just because you say they should. For “equality.” Lest you forget or didn’t notice, I’m also a woman. Note that byline. I see the game you’re playing.

There is no secret patriarchy meeting where men sit in leather armchairs discussing how to pay women less as they absentmindedly scratch their crotches. Sorry chickadees, but if you’re not getting paid well, the simple answer is an unsettling one: it’s not the pay gap, it’s you, boo.

If your bank account is as full as your refrigerator’s crisper, it could be for any of the following. Yes, another numbered list. Bitches love lists.

  1. You’re not actually worth what you think you’re worth. “I think therefore I am” is lovely in theory, not a guidebook on how to leverage your uncanny ability to be an insufferable twit into a lucrative career.
  2. Your proclivity to whine like a door hinge in desperate need of WD-40 translates into your worth ethic. Which is crappy.
  3. Like the rest of your life, you’ve made bad choices in your profession. Social work, teaching pre-schoolers, or professional meat-protesting might be fulfilling. But it isn’t filling your bank account.
  4. You refuse to fight and stand up for yourself.

Let’s go through this point by point.

One: A person is paid by how much that job is worth and how well they perform it. Simpler still: your job is worth what someone is willing to pay for it. For some reason this basic concept is lost on people who moan and groan from sun up to sun down. Could be a muddled mind due to consumption of soy and/or hormones. For you feminists, probably both. So if you’re not getting paid a lot of money, it could be because you’re not worth a lot of money. Despite what Maybeline is telling you. Pro-tip: work more than you watch TV.

Two: Working generally requires a sense of work ethic. Which last I checked, didn’t include “An everlasting cryfest of all the ways my life isn’t fair due mostly to a series of questionable life choices which may include tattooing cat whiskers on my face.” If your solution to a problem is to complain, then I wouldn’t pay you much either. Your complaints actually cost me time, energy and patience. So if you, the feminist, confronts her work problems with “But, but, but…men!” then I wouldn’t give you a raise either. Work the problem like a competent adult. Solve it on your own. Prove your value to your company by DOING SOMETHING.

Three: Plenty of ladies have already figured out how to make a pretty penny. Let’s note not all women are complaining about the “pay gap.” Could be because some of us are too busy stacking our gold coins like little princess castles, while you cry into recycled tissues. So if lots of us chicas are doing well, and you aren’t, that suggests there’s no such mythical force keeping ladies down. Maybe getting the lifestyle you want means you need to get a better paying job. See points above for tips.

Last point, which is the least likely based on what I’ve seen from feminists: that you are competent, you don’t complain, you’re in a job which should pay well but doesn’t. This would be the Unicorn Analogy. But lemme clue you in: sometimes you have to ask for more money. Not all employers will just throw more cash at you just because. You have to ask for it. This doesn’t involve complaining, but by proving how you add value to the company, by listing all you do for the company, and how much you think those duties are worth. If you’re good at your job, if you’re actually difficult to replace, and you’re respected by your employer(s), prepare for a raise. Yes, it is that simple. Toss the yoga pants, suit up, and go get some more money. See also: WATCH: Jordan Peterson Just Nuked Feminism in Under 30 Minutes.

There is no pay gap. There is no reason to blame men for not getting paid well. Respectable men and women in business want the best people working for and with them. They do not want some broad who excuses her uncanny ability to suck the lifeforce out of every space she enters on “muh 77 cents on the dollar.” Got it?

~ Written by Courtney Kirchoff